Today, I bring you FirefighterWife.com advisor and Fire Up Your Love Life Fire Wife, Heather Isaacs. Here is a little bit from Heather.
My husband is the EMS Captain for the Winter Park Fire Rescue Department and he just hit his 20 year mark in May. We’ve been married since 12-12-12 (he picked the date so he’d never forget), so we just celebrated our one year anniversary. I work as the Planning & Entitlement Manager for a land development company in Orlando. I’ve been there for 6 years and we will likely be building out our community for the next 20 years, so I plan to retire from them and see this great place I’ve had an opportunity to build. I also own and operate my own Pure Romance business, where I try to educate women on sexual health and teach them how to embrace intimacy and feel comfortable and beautiful in their own skin.
How did you two meet?
We met on (wait for it…) a dating website. Honestly, neither one of us had any business being on the site. I was in the final stages of my divorce from my practice husband (we were together for 9 years) and he was just getting started on his divorce. He set his profile up as a joke, but there was just something about his sarcasm and cockiness that drew me in. We talked for a couple of weeks via the phone and texting and then made an actual date where he picked me up on his Harley…the rest is history.
Do you remember your initial thoughts about him being in the fire
Yep…(A) that’s hot! (B) What the hell have I gotten myself into? (C) I can do this. He is a great man and many of the reasons I’m falling for him contribute to his desire to help others and be selfless.
Have those thoughts changed? If so, how?
Not at all. He’s still hot…somedays I still wonder what I’ve gotten myself into and with the help of this group…I know I can do this. Firefighterwife.com has given me support when I needed it most and allowed me to share my strength with others in need.
What helps you keep worrying at bay? (-OR-) What do you do when
you are worrying?
This group [The Fire Wife Sisterhood]…and the fact that I trust him and his training. He works with a great group of guys that I just love to spoil with baked goods. I know that they will protect him and he will protect himself. I know that you can’t control everything, so we do celebrate every day and live like it’s our last.
What is the #1 quality you think a woman has to have (or grow to
have) to be a firefighter’s wife?
Confidence. Confidence in her ability to hold down the fort,confidence in his ability to safely do his job, and confidence in herself as his one and only. Quite a few of our sisters struggle with jealousy and wonder about the “groupies,” but I know without a doubt that I give my husband everything he could ever want in a wife, best friend and mother. He’d be crazy to go somewhere else.
Perks of being a firefighter wife?
Finding this group of women that I can call my sisters and friends. This bond we share of the struggles and joys we endure is something I never knew could exist.
How do you think you would feel if any of your children followed
in his footsteps?
I would be honored to have any of our children follow in his footsteps. My 4 year old son is his number one fan and is obsessed with anything FD related. We just took him on his first engine ride for his birthday…he was in heaven.
Do you have any rituals about saying goodbye when he leaves for
shift or if when you end a phone call when he is on shift?
I always tell him, “I love you. Be safe.” We both wear dog tags with Genesis 31:49 imprinted on it as our prayer for while we are apart. He always says, “See you in the morning” whether he’s texting goodnight or leaving for his shift.
What is the best advice you could offer anyone in a relationship
with a fireman?
This is a tough one and something I could probably write a book on if I were a better writer. I think communication is key in any relationship. Learning how to speak to one another with respect and honesty can take any awkward or difficult subject in a new direction. Talk about the positive things like what you like during your intimate moments. Talk about the difficult subjects like finances or jealousy. Just talk…don’t expect him to read your mind and don’t hold it in and let the resentment build.
What does the Sisterhood provide for you and would you recommend
it to all fire wives?
The Sisterhood provides me a place of comfort in knowing that there is always someone else who has been through a similar situation. It also provides me with a place that I can share what I’ve learned. I’ve typically had a hard time getting along with other women, but the Sisterhood is different. I’ve never been around a group of women like this…we aren’t catty or judgmental…we honestly just want to love our husbands. I try to promote the group to as many fire wives as I can and I’m speaking this month to the Central Florida Fire Chief’s Association and will also be at FRI East 2014 in Daytona Beach.
We know what your firefighter’s passion is, but what sets YOUR
heart on fire?
Such a tough question…but I’d have to say sharing my story with people. I’ve been through a lot over the last 4 years and have gone through pregnancy, divorce, weight loss, falling in love, getting married and blending a family. I’ve learned more about who I am and who I want to be. I’ve learned about how I want my children to see me and what I want them to take from the lessons I’ve taught.
Tough and often touchy topic… Have you had “the talk” with your
fireman about his last wishes if he were to ever die in the line of
Yes. And it was hard…for him and me. I keep a notebook with information in it about what he wants to wear, who he wants to talk, the music that will play and what memento he wants each child to have. I don’t like thinking about it, but I know it is a reality of the job. I also know that my FD family and the Sisterhood will be there to lift me up.
Did anyone warn you or give you any advice early in your
relationship in regards to him being a firefighter?
No, I didn’t get any advice about him being a firefighter. That is one of the main reasons I found the Sisterhood. I didn’t have any friends that were in the fire service or married to firemen, and until you’re a part of it…you really don’t know.
Thank you Heather for sharing with us. Join me the 1st and 3rd Monday of each month to learn more about the fire wives of the Fire Wife Sisterhood. To learn more about the sisterhood, please visit http://firefighterwife.com/join
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