Sometimes you get so used to your life being influenced by the fire service that you forget how much of the world is not captive to the demands you are.   I had that repeat epiphany this morning as I savored a humid, slow 4 mile run that started around 6:20 am.   The gorgeous sunrise was breathtaking even in my flat, suburbia Ohio scenery.  I found myself wishing I could run every morning.   Why don’t I do this? Just get it out of the way.  First thoughts in my mind on the bike trail with my favorite podcasts preaching encouragement in my ears.    And then I remembered.   I know why I don’t do this more often.   Even though it’s recommended by every popular business coach and counselor out there as the best way to fit in a work out and clear your mind.    Truly how many days are there in a year when my husband is home in the morning with nowhere to rush off to?  And it’s a day that I don’t have to rush into the office.   No child needs a last minute load of laundry or lunch made.  And the weather cooperates.  (that really narrows it down in a family of 6 in Ohio with the fire department schedule!)

So I pushed out to the 2 mile turn around instead of taking the 3 mile cut off loop.   I noticed all the traffic starting to pick up near the schools as the high school drop off was beginning.  It was a view that seemed strange to me from this perspective.  I always wondered how all those ladies were able to get out on the path in the mornings like that.   (I secretly think they must have saintly husbands who go into their jobs later so they can get their run in, however we all know we make up stories in our head about people that are usually far from accurate.)  Forget that.  I’m so filled up that my husband is there helping and allowing me this precious space.  A true luxury in my life.

I felt soooooo lucky to not have to be in the mad dash this morning.  Soooooo lucky to be out of the stage of middle of the night wake ups, surprise morning fevers, whiney, clingy, but warm and snuggly morning toddlers exhausted me and all I wanted was an earlier morning sleep in.     By the time I got back, one was already off on the bus.  The second had sweet talked her daddy into driving her to school.  And 3 and 4 were up and rubbing their eyes and independently selecting their own clothes and doing their own hair while I relaxed into some stretches on the living room floor.   I even snuck in a 10 minute shower while they were eating breakfast.  Heaven. On. Earth.

I have settled into a season of fully enjoying the moments we are in.  Those young children years seemed so difficult at the time.  But what is that saying?   The days are long but the years are short.  It was just the blink of an eye.  And one more blink of an eye and I can run whenever I want in the mornings because no one will need me even if Dad is away at the firehouse.  These runs may become lonely.   And perhaps then I’ll finally be able to say yes to the neighborhood moms who asked me for years to run with them in the mornings.  And I’d analyze and derive my calendar from every direction just to find one morning every 6 weeks that the schedule matched up to do so (and pray it didn’t downpour!).

I know some of those ladies didn’t quite understand my schedule conundrum.  But they were patient with me and will welcome me back with open arms I hope when that season finally arrives.  I pray we can still slow jog a couple miles together without being too winded to chat it up.

For all of you ladies who haven’t reached this season yet…. hang in there.  For those of you beyond, you are my inspiring warriors!  These days are long and could easily make one weary.  But we press on toward the prize and run with endurance the race set out for us.  Not for anyone else but just for us.  Because we were made for this life.