Filling Up the Love Tank Before Shift

by | Everyday, Fire Family Life, Firefighter Marriage, Intimacy

Do you ever wish your firefighter could read your mind about what you want the day or night before he goes back on shift? Well, wish granted!

This question came straight from firefighters to their spouses.

“What is the best help or prep we (the husbands) can do before going on shift?”



We saw a variety of answers pour in from the Sisterhood. Here are the top 5 responses:


  1. Give us some quality time! Guard our time before you go on shift. Wife time, kid time, family time, date nights…we want whatever we can get!
  2. Turn off the TV, phone, Facebook, games….We want you to be present when you are home.
  3. Help pick up. I am going to let share a little secret. Dishes are a woman’s mortal enemy, saving her from them can be heroic! Check for stuff off the floor, take out the trash, make sure coats and boots are put away, etc. Every little bit helps.
  4. Help with the kids. Make lunches, baths and bedtime, stories and prayers. We love to see you love on them!
  5. Get your uniforms in the laundry at a reasonable time so we can spend the night with you and not your stinky socks!


A few of the runners up were:
  • Coffeeeeee…….need we say more?
  • Let the dog out/feed the dog. They really are man’s best friend 🙂
  • Make sure our cars are road worthy
  • Bring in lunchbags and dishes so we have something to put lunch in.


We also couldn’t keep some of these responses to ourselves. Peruse at your pleasure!

” [No] Candy (aka Candy Crush can go a bit without you trying for the next level!)”

“I totally agree with everyone with spending the quality time the day before. It’s my primary love language, and the tank empties fast when I’m alone with 4 kids and a very, very empty tank.”

“I need you to turn off the tv, put down your tablet and phone, and come to bed at a decent hour so we can ‘talk’…and by ‘talk’ I mean sex…I don’t want there to be any miscommunication about it.”

“I agree…sex….Put the phone away and give me some!”

“I would love to have my FF read the bible/pray with me. I fall more in love with him when we slow down and connect on a spiritual level….More ‘cookie’ time with less distractions in the bedroom.”

“I told my FF we should pretend he is on shift tomorrow so we can get some ‘stuff’ done tonight!”

In all seriousness, time is what we really all want. We love our FFs more than we can say. Time spent together makes the times apart seem more doable.

Help fill my love tank by spending a little time with just me – hanging out or snuggling at the end of the day. It helps me to be a better wife to you and a better mother to our children. Life is stressful for you and also for me when you are at work, and there are no guarantees you will be home. You are more important than tasks. That little bit of time makes me feel extra loved, extra cherished, and that we are a team who can do anything and everything together. I’ll do my best to take care of the rest.

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On a mission to be and inspire us all to be better humans, to strengthen fire families & marriages, to nurture and encourage fire wives, do "good business" in all areas of my life and of course, love on my 4 kids.

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